Alive!

September 14, 2009
Another week begins. I have not felt this good in a while! I am energized and not tired. I woke up this morning and knew right away that something was different. I realized that I felt alive. But it was beyond that. Even when I was exhausted and my mind was foggy, I was aware that I did not have the oppressive feeling of deadness that I had been carrying around for years. It was always there, even on a good day in Klamath Falls. Sometimes I would feel like it was just sheer force of will that kept it from swallowing me whole. At some point in these past few months, it went away. I sometimes think about the days I spent in that house just trying so hard to get through each day—it was hard work to schedule myself and surround myself with what I needed to get through a day. I marvel at the fact that I did it. And now it's gone. I am grateful. The exhaustion I have felt over the past couple of weeks had more to do with a disrupted sleep pattern than any feeling of dread at facing another day. So this morning, after going to bed at 1:15 and sleeping through the night, I woke up at a reasonable hour and felt fabulous. This is how I work best. I am definitely not a morning person. But since sleeping in the tent necessitates a whole different system, it eventually caught up with me. But I was able to get a lot done yesterday and get back to a daily round that works for me. I can see the results!
We had an appointment to look at a place this evening, but it was too far out of town, which made it impractical for winter since there's no bus line out that far. We did find out that the local transit system includes express buses that go to Montpelier, Middlebury, and St. Albans, all of which are between 30 and 40 miles from Burlington in opposite directions. This means that we can expand our search, since we would be able to use the bus to get into the city in the winter. Bill does not want to have to rely on the truck. So now we have some leads in those places, too.
It rained like crazy yesterday morning! This guy came to Meeting on his bicycle and when he came in for the book discussion and removed his backpack, I could see a little wet dog head. He carried his dachshund in the backpack and the poor little guy was soaked. Cute dog, though. He was a good Quaker dog and sat quietly through the discussion and then Meeting, running around to greet everyone at the end!
Today was really nice. It was so peaceful sitting outside and reading this afternoon. It's supposed to start cooling down into the 60s during the day and the 40s at night starting tomorrow. The leaves are starting to change faster now. I am not really sure when peak foliage season is supposed to be, but it's a big deal around here. Today we saw some chicken breakfast sausage with Vermont blueberries and maple syrup. They are purple. I had to get a package to try. Last week we had some of the fatter sausage that was chicken and apple with Vermont syrup. Those were really good! Pick-your-own is getting started now and I might do some of that if we find a place before the season ends. I was able to get a Vermont tomato and a bag of local apples in the grocery store. I missed the Farmer's Market Saturday because of my migraine. Maybe this coming Saturday we will be able to go. There is a huge local food movement around here, which I think is great! It looks like we will have to learn to eat fewer potatoes, since we are no longer in potato growing territory. Some come from Maine, I guess. But there are lots of other things that offset the lack of local potatoes! Next Monday, Paul Roberts, who wrote, The End of Food, which is a great book, is giving a free lecture at UVM. I wrote it down so we can remember to go. There is just so much going on here—it is a very vibrant community. The community seems alive, too. There are lots of people from somewhere else here. I hadn't really thought of that before we got here, because my experiences with New England have been the opposite, both when I lived in New Hampshire in the 70s and 80s and had people openly expressing their unhappiness that outsiders were moving in, and when we visited Maine a few years ago. New Hampshire may well be very different now than it was then. But this place most certainly is not insulated or isolated. I am sure that there must be tensions between the newcomers and the old-timers, and it will be interesting to see how that all plays out as we learn more about the dynamics of community here. I think that the fact that there are people from all over is a good thing, because new ideas are always welcome. Well, they are not exactly welcome everywhere. But they are welcome to me and they seem to be welcome here, so maybe that's a good sign!